textsfromlastnight

Friend sent me this site... some of the stuff is pretty funny. For example...

(919): so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.

(971): I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.

(404): this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
(404): i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator

Hi, I'm 12.

Last week I went to see Inglorious Basterds with some friends. When I got to the ticket counter and was in the midst of paying for my ticket... the lady asked to see my ID. WTH?!? Carded for a rated R movie, are you serious? So sad. I'm not even close to being 18...

Movie was great by the way.

Dragonnn Punch!

R: so one night we went bar hopping in LG hit a total of 4 bars
R: and i was DD and obviously the drunkasses in my car wanted to get food at jack
R: so i drive them there, they order their food, and i start driving back
R: bryant then decides that he wants to throw away his wrapper out the window
R: but being the drunkass he was, he forgot to roll down the window
R: so he ends up slamming his watch into the window when trying to "throw out the wrapper"
R: and the window shatters glass all over him
R: and he had no idea wtf happened until he looked down and found class all over his lap
R: he had a few small cuts apparently
R: his motherfucking rolex shattered my window
R: and i was like
R: YOU'RE TOO STRONG
R: and he was like "shiet..the right stuff is DEF THE RIGHT STUFF"